My Death
I saw myself on the verge of dying last night, well early this morning anyway. Of course I was dreaming but it was still pretty upsetting anyway. I was at work dealing my usual sloppy game of Roulette and everything was fine until I came back from my break. I got back on the table and realised that my hands would not function. They were twisted and stiff. Whether or not this is a reference to arthritis I don't know.
I tried to spin the ball but to a dismal effort as the ball just sunk into one of the numbers without making even half a revolution of the wheel. The dealer that I sent on their break, for some reason, was still standing behind me and took over for me when I broke down and cried. The players didn't care, the heartless pricks. I collapsed onto a nearby closed roulette table and started shaking violently, crying uncontrollably, trying hard as I could to pry my hands open. My supervisor came over to comfort me and try and calm me while the pit boss stood back saying that i'd be alright in a moment.
Is that where i was going to die? At work, dealing Roulette? I don't think so, although the life insurance payout is always greater for work related deaths so at least that's one good thing to come from this.
I looked at my hands that had turned almost transparent so that my bones were visible as a kind of spiderweb pattern through my fingers. I ran out of work and to my mother's old house where my sister and her friend Michelle were living, my dogs close behind jumping over bushes and fences.
I knocked on the loungeroom window with my deformed right club of a hand alerting my sister; her rushing to the front door seeing the pain, seeing me shake uncontrollably. I collapse onto the floor when she opens the door cradelling my head. She tries to call my mother on her phone but my mother is too busy having a good night with her one of her friends that she won't come to help.
I woke my girlfriend up with my crying which i do quite often when I dream. She, in turn, woke me up and I felt like shit. I was shaking after I was awake too.
I tried to spin the ball but to a dismal effort as the ball just sunk into one of the numbers without making even half a revolution of the wheel. The dealer that I sent on their break, for some reason, was still standing behind me and took over for me when I broke down and cried. The players didn't care, the heartless pricks. I collapsed onto a nearby closed roulette table and started shaking violently, crying uncontrollably, trying hard as I could to pry my hands open. My supervisor came over to comfort me and try and calm me while the pit boss stood back saying that i'd be alright in a moment.
Is that where i was going to die? At work, dealing Roulette? I don't think so, although the life insurance payout is always greater for work related deaths so at least that's one good thing to come from this.
I looked at my hands that had turned almost transparent so that my bones were visible as a kind of spiderweb pattern through my fingers. I ran out of work and to my mother's old house where my sister and her friend Michelle were living, my dogs close behind jumping over bushes and fences.
I knocked on the loungeroom window with my deformed right club of a hand alerting my sister; her rushing to the front door seeing the pain, seeing me shake uncontrollably. I collapse onto the floor when she opens the door cradelling my head. She tries to call my mother on her phone but my mother is too busy having a good night with her one of her friends that she won't come to help.
I woke my girlfriend up with my crying which i do quite often when I dream. She, in turn, woke me up and I felt like shit. I was shaking after I was awake too.




